The Progression of Pondering

  Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5EB9avF1EXY

 The largest source of existential angst is the quest for purpose. It's a ubiquitous condition amongst humans, we seem to crave a meaning. Personally, when I was younger, the search for meaning weighed heavily on my shoulders and invaded every aspect of my existence. As I've grown older and actively pursued excellence in athletics and personal academic study, I've come to the conclusion that there is an important distinction to be made. There are two types of purpose, one of which being prone to fallacy: extrinsic and intrinsic.

   I've viscerally felt the connection we all have to the universe. I've spent much time amongst natural landscapes, breathing deeply and gazing at each and every inhabitant of these landscapes. Viscerally, I know we're all manifestations of the same source; perpetually locked in an everlasting cycle of forms, incessantly growing and decomposing. So, for me, a logical progression from there is that, through us, the universe acquires meaning and purpose. If it can be intrinsically-generated, then it exists.

   The confusion and anxiety I experienced when I was younger was a consequence of the notion that purpose is extrinsically-assigned. That we're each born with a destiny to fulfill. Indeed, the condition of purpose being an intrinsically-generated destiny is exceedingly liberating. Imagine if you were actually born into a pre-determined destiny, one which you had no agency in creating and were inevitably forced to follow. What a miserable, constraining existence an extrinsically-assigned purpose would be.

   I remember laying in bed at night sometimes frantically scrolling through potential "roles" I could fill. As though I needed to be the embodiment of some cerebral, cultural archetype. As I've come to intimately know myself through copious hours alone, I realize that the ego is extremely pliable. You could be a traveling bard one year, traveling through towns and strumming your favourite instrument, while the next year you could become an ultra-marathon runner. Of course, culture will tell you to buckle down, go to school, get a career, fill a role. Don't be silly, what're you? A hippy?!

 This existence, in this particular generation, is one of innumerable opportunity. Don't rush into university, you'll be so frequently bombarded with extrinsically-designated tasks that you'll be left scant time to discover your intrinsic nature. Discovering your intrinsic nature is fundamental to everything you will do in this life, it is the source from which you will proceed into everything you do. I've previously outlined many methods in which you can probe into your intrinsic nature, I do this purely as a service to you.

 The only inherent freedom you have in this existence is the ability to harmonize your mind and body to explore, learn, conquer and exert effort. After an arduous sentence in the public education system, I've realized we're doing it all wrong, especially in an era of amazing scientific progress. Humans are born naturally curious about the natural world. The absolutely most stifling thing you can do to this curiosity is to shove young humans into a classroom and force them to sit down and learn about the world through a book. The world is right there beyond the windows! Let them explore it! Isn't that a peculiar thing about our education system? It's absolutely devoid of experiential learning, which, in my opinion, is the most effective. I wouldn't assert that it's one or the other, a healthy balance of experience and book-studying would be much more conducive to progress.